March 13, 2018
A Story of Recovery by Chris Freeman
Part 1 – My First Meeting
I was only 19 years old when I attended my first 12-step recovery meeting. It was a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous.
Actually there were 2 separate meetings that day. The first meeting was the time I spent sitting in a cloudy smoke filled room, chairs surrounding old wooden tables. Ashtrays and coffee cups scattered about the crowd of folks seated around the tables.
How did a nice guy like me end up in a place like this?
I had a problem getting caught
My motivation for attending A.A. was not that I was dying from merciless drug addiction coupled with unrelenting alcoholism. No, the driving force was that I had a problem getting caught.
It seemed that I got caught a lot, a whole lot! Somehow my behavior was not that of an upstanding young man with a bright future ahead of him, but instead, that of a little, young, spoiled, rich, rebellious, and spiteful brat.
At the first meeting, the one with all the smoke, there were the usual-unusual folk, mostly old and weathered – like an old boot that’s been worn too long in the rain.
At the time I thought they were old and haggard – at the very least they weren’t at all relevant to me and my horrible situation.
Looking back I would probably say they were just normal men and women from all walks of life, rich and poor, young and elderly.
It’s kind of funny now I am the old and weathered one… worn too long in the rain!
The God Word
At this first meeting, my first exposure to AA, it took only 15 minutes for me to hear the word God mentioned. Ouch, that hurt!
I was sitting on a chair along the back wall of the room.
I thought to myself,
“What are these people talking about? God!
What does God have to do with staying out of trouble?”
I had never thought of needing God to get me out of anything in the past. The people in the room certainly did not look like they would know much about God. None of the men were dressed up for church and the ladies in the room, well I will leave that one alone!
All I needed was a way to quit getting caught.
Elvis has left the building
Nope, this was not what I wanted to expose myself to…I got to get out of here!
Again I really did not know what it was I was looking for. I just wanted to get my mom and dad off my back and give me what I needed: money to pay my rent and bills, since I sort of drank and used it all up, AGAIN!
Once again I was broke and could not survive in the condition I was in. I took a deep sigh of relief, stood up and left the building.
I said, “Thank God that’s over with.”
The Second Meeting
If funny to me that I still think about and often recall this meeting I had 40 years ago. This is the one single meeting that changed me, although at the time I did not realize it.
In my next post I will tell you about the man that followed me out of that “GOD” meeting.
His name was Don P.
